I think Jr. High is a transitional time in a young adult's life where kids are vulnerable, insecure and give in easily to tempting new things. I was no different than any other Jr. High kid. I was easily swayed into trying the latest popular product. If most of my friends were doing it, it must be cool. So I have an addiction that I picked up in Jr. High. Something I carry around daily, something I'm utterly lost without. The minute I start to need a fix my hand goes to my pocket to feel the familiar cylindrical shape of my addiction.
I went through the same D.A.R.E. program as most kids in the late 80's, my parents warned me against the dangers of alcohol and cigarettes. I watched as the Joe Camel campaign was unraveled to reveal it's true identity as a covert way to entice young kids to smoke. But it was no Joe Camel that captured me, no it was something, dare I say it, even more addictive. Yes this addiction didn't even need to disguise itself in a cool leather jacket, it only needed to touch my lips to hold me bound for the rest of my days. Maybe had it been more overtly addictive I would have known to stay away. I would have seen the future of my addiction. The empty tubes found in the couch cushions, the late night trips to the drug store to replenish my supply. The obsessive compulsive application before bedtime which if forgotten has the power to pull me from the warmth of my bed to the cold bathroom medicine cabinet for an application. I would have seen how every Christmas my husband could count on the one thing I would wish for in my stocking. The one thing anyone who truly knows me knows I cannot be without.
Had I known, had I been warned I might have said no. No to ChapStick. No to an addiction so controlling that it changes your chemical makeup. Once a ChapStick addiction is formed the lips create an imbalance of naturally produced moisture, leaving an addict with no choice but to reapply the waxy soothing balm. No choice but to get their fix. So to those of you who also suffer from the prison that is a ChapStick addiction I offer new hope. No, not a way to overcome the addiction, but a way to beautify the ugliness that holds you bound to this tiny tube. What I offer is a new, glamorous form of the same old addiction. If you aren't already enslaved by this balm of enticement steer far far away from the glittery new Chapstick True Shimmer. I on the other hand will be buying it up in bulk. And if you want to try some, think it through, talk to your doctor if need be and realize all that it entails. There is no turning back once addiction sets in. Then if you have looked to your new future and accept it's habit forming consequences just ask me for some ChapStick True Shimmer, it'll be in my right pocket. And yes Travis, this would make a great stocking stuffer.