Tuesday, September 18, 2007

My life in stories

I think that I think differently than most people. My mom used to always tell me that I had a strange approach to things, and usually did everything my own way. What she probably meant was that she had an odd child, and wanted to say it nicely. Lately I've been thinking of my life in terms of children's story books. Probably because I've been reading more to my kids. I'm trying to make up for all the TV they watch by reading to them every night. But it seems that a few times a day I'll look at a situation I am facing and think, I could write this into a children's story.

For instance. This morning when I went out to the fridge in the garage to get Dallas' chocolate milk for his lunch, there was a long, skiny, spiny tail poking out from the bottom of the fridge. I looked at it for a minute trying to see what it was, hoping that it wasn't a rat(no I've never seen a rat in my house or yard, but it somewhat resembled a rat's tail), and then the tail moved and was replaced by the small head of a lizard. So here's the situation: I had to get the milk to make the lunch, and we were running late as usual, but I was quite worried about this lizard living in my garage. As I was staring at him trying to decide if I should risk it, I heard another movement coming from the other corner of the garage, I'm suspecting this lizard wasn't alone. A family of lizards had made their home in my garage, and were stopping me from getting my son his chocolate milk. What is a mother to do?

My other book idea I've had lately is inspired by my daughter. Often when I am doing her hair in the morning, I have to comb through a lot of snarls. This causes problems because it hurts her head, but we have to comb them out to stop the hurt. Now tell me, what exactly is a snarl? I'm not really sure myself, but that is what my mom used to call the knots in my hair. So with this I'm thinking I'd look at it from a kid's point of view, and go into detail about the snarls that live in your hair and come out at night while you're sleeping, only to hurt you in the head when your mom tries to comb them out. Just when you think you've gotten rid of them, they come back the next day. Darn snarls.

Bare with me, I'm not done yet. The other idea I had was somewhat similar to Dr. Seuss' book, Left Foot, Left Foot, Right Foot, Right. Only mine would be called Wrong Foot, Wrong Foot, Right Foot, Right. No matter how often I watch my children try to put on their shoes, they always choose the wrong shoe for the wrong foot. You'd think it wouldn't happen all that often since odds are that you'll choose the right foot 50% of the time, but my kids only choose the right one about 10%.

Now my last book will be called, Eat Dallas, Eat! I have such a hard time getting my son to eat. He is picky, picky, picky. And really doesn't have much of an appetite. We are struggling right now because he's not eating his school lunch. Literally we have had a number of days where he brings his entire lunch home untouched. Now you might think I'm a mean mom, and put things into his lunch that he doesn't like. But no, I'm the nicest mom, and put things like brownies and cookies in trying to entice the boy to eat. And does he eat them? No. Yesterday he came home with a package of cupcakes (the 100 calorie pack, like I said, I'm trying to be healthy) unopened. What kind of kid does that? My husband often questions if this kid is truly his biological son (he is, I swear). I give up. I keep on telling him that I'm going to come to school everyday and sit by him and make him eat. I guess maybe I should actually try it. This morning we discussed a motivational program where we make a chart and he gets a toy if he eats for a set amount of days. The lengths I go to for this boy!

My question for you: what children's story are you living?


Courtney said...

You are so funny about lizards. I think they are supposed to be good to have around because they eat spiders or something (snakes are even better b/c they eat scorpions)

I don't have any stories - real life about does me in. I love the snarls story idea. Can you get me a copy when it's done because we frequently have this fight especially Paige. IT is also the reason I prefer morning baths to night baths.

Becky said...

Nancy, I loved this blog! If you are "odd" because you think in stories, then we can start an Odd Blog because I do too. I really like the Snarl one. What do the snarls look like? What do they eat? Where do they hide in the day time? These are good questions.
I will think about the stories I encounter daily and then share some with you soon :)

pam said...

So start writing and illustrating some children's books! You and Becky could collaborate. Were you ever able to get Dallas's chocolate milk out of the fridge? Also, this is the mother coming out in me. You used the word bare when you really meant bear? I think bare with me would mean we should all take our clothes off together.

Nancy said...

Mom, I had originally spelled it that way and thought that meant the animal. I'll have to look it up.

curley girley said...

My story is I have my kid on my back and he keeps getting heavier and heavier and it's getting harder to walk, but what I don't know is Mr. Sticky hands is picking things up along the way and by the end he's hanging onto a grand piano with his death grip fat fingers and I can't figure out why he's so heavy. (now that was a long sentance)

Anonymous said...

Silly Nancy. On my mission we would purposefully catch lizards and bring them home and set them loose in our house. They eat bugs - even roaches! Nurture the lizard family. Cultivate it. Breed them if you can. And let that be the happy ending to your story. By the way, I support any and all children's book endeavors. You go girl.
-Tami Gordon

Autumn said...

Nancy Pants. You crack me up. I loved these stories. And thanks for the cleaning tips. Between the markers and paint flying around my house, I am always looking for ways to save my furniture.

Autumn said...

Oh and sadly, most of my children story living involves poop. I'll trade you for the lizards.